This past week I attended two graduations: one for my five-year old daughter from preschool, and the other for my 18-year old babysitter from high school. Like all such events, the resulting ceremonies are mainly a reflection of the teachers and the administration that planned them, rather than of the graduates. Based on the results, I’m thinking that maybe we ought to send our kids to daycare and home school them as teens.
The high school graduation was just short of a travesty. I am still struggling to decide which was worse: the quality of the speeches or the attire of those giving them. Was it always like this?
I have only the barest recollection of my own high school graduation, and certainly none of the speeches that were given, but I am pretty sure that the commencement speaker did not spend a good part of the time testifying to her expectation that the graduates were bound to be screw-ups in college. I am also pretty sure the aforementioned speaker did not wear a tight, backless mini-dress. (No, I am not making this up, but most lamentably, I do not have photos of this particular get up. Too bad, because I would have happily posted them.)
In contrast, my five-year old daughter’s pre-school graduation was the picture of decorum. Despite toddlers running everywhere and parents chasing after them, the overall effect was sweet and sincere. Ok, it was boring too, but at least the teacher’s bodies were fully covered and they spoke to the kids as if they actually expected them to behave nicely in kindergarten.
Maybe there are plenty of good high schools out there that manage to pull off decent graduations. But based on this past weekend, if you have to pick between attending one or the other, go for the little ones. The nostalgia is better and at the end you can all go out for ice cream.
The Drool Buster Diaries 